by Frank Coffey

Moscow – Minutes after the arrest of Elmer Stewart Rhodes on January 13 for seditious conspiracy against the United States, Russian president Vladimir Putin offered the now jailed Oath Keeper asylum, eTruePolitics has learned.  “Comrade Elmer is a swell fellow,” said Putin, “and as soon as he learns our language, I will make him a Supreme Colonel General of the Russian Federation.”

“I don’t usually like Commies,” commented Rhodes, a Texas native, who added that he would consider Putin’s offer if it “included camo thermal underwear.”

A source close to Putin said Russia had stockpiled double XX and triple XXX camo underwear for the expected flow of Oath Keepers to the frequently frozen country.

Sources close to Donald Trump said the former president denied playing any role in Putin’s offer to Rhodes but “hoped” the two would be happy together.

 

Photo courtesy of the Times Record News