Category: Quick Hits

An investigation by the American Internet Research Firm failed to find any nude photos of Marjorie Taylor Greene. “There is a god,” an AIRF researcher told eTruePolitics.

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Clarence Thomas will reportedly resign his Supreme Court seat to join My Pillow as Vice-President of Napping. “I’m a fathead and need a firm pillow,” explained Thomas in his lengthiest written statement since joining the Court...

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Governor Greg Abbott has signed into law a bill which criminalizes decent behavior of any kind, under any circumstances, within Texas. “Republicans will end decency in the Lone Star State,” vowed...

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Embattled Republican Rep. George Santos issued a statement today demanding that Marjorie Taylor Greene stop talking to him.  “I can’t afford to be embarrassed,” explained...

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A Saturday night rally in New York City supporting Rep. George Santos was dispersed without incident by the NYPD. “Neither of them had their hearts in it,” said one...

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Sources close to Rudy Giuliani say the former mayor has abandoned Scotch, his favorite adult beverage, in favor of Subpoena Coladas.

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All women are human beings. Marjorie Taylor Greene is a woman. Hence, Marjorie Taylor Greene is a human being. (Warning: The claims contained in this syllogism have been known to cause...

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A demonstration outside Dallas Cowboys Stadium supporting embattled team owner Jerry Jones was dispersed peacefully Thursday afternoon by Dallas Police, eTruePolitics has learned. “Neither of their hearts were in it,” said a patrolman.

A demonstration outside Dallas Cowboys Stadium supporting embattled team owner Jerry Jones was dispersed peacefully Thursday afternoon by Dallas Police, eTruePolitics has learned. “Neither of their hearts were in it,” said a...

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Quick Hits

  • Rudy Giuliani’s (current) favorite wine: Pinot Aggrievio.

  • An investigation by the American Internet Research Firm failed to find any nude photos of Marjorie Taylor Greene. “There is a god,” an AIRF researcher told eTruePolitics.

  • Clarence Thomas will reportedly resign his Supreme Court seat to join My Pillow as Vice-President of Napping. “I’m a fathead and need a firm pillow,” explained Thomas in his lengthiest written statement since joining the Court in 1991.

  • Governor Greg Abbott has signed into law a bill which criminalizes decent behavior of any kind, under any circumstances, within Texas. “Republicans will end decency in the Lone Star State,” vowed Abbott.

  • eTP Book Club Quick Read: “The Wit & Wisdom of  Lauren Boebert”

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