Washington – Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas has been diagnosed with Metastatic Arrogance (MA), an incurable psychiatric disease. The finding was published today by the American Mental Health Association. The group includes many of the same psychiatrists who found former president Donald Trump to be psychologically unfit to hold office.

“We got the last one right,” said a spokesman for the AMHA.  “And, sadly, we’re right about this one too. Clarence Thomas is in our opinion a first-class jerk and always will be.”

“I’ve battled arrogance all my life,” said Thomas in a rare public statement about anything. “And if you ask me, I’ve done a stupendous job.”

“Arrogant people have arrogant wives,” Ginni Thomas, wife of the chief justice, told reporters in what was described as a heated exchange on the steps of the Supreme Court Building.

“Everyone who disagrees with us is scum,” shouted Thomas to a cheering group of Proud Boys waiting for a scheduled colloquy with the courts six Republican Justices.


Photo courtesy of Mother Jones