Austin, TX (eTruePolitics) – Conspiracy theorist and uniquely unhinged American performance artist Alex Jones announced today plans for “The Cemetery of Humanity,” a family amusement park catering to “all white Americans, especially Christians, and anyone who hates Hillary Clinton.”

The surprising announcement came minutes after social platforms YouTube, Facebook, Spotify and Google banned Jones and his reviled InfoWhores website for violating  policies against hate speech and harassment.

 Finding a location for a family amusement park owned by a man who insists that the 2012 murder of 20 first graders and six adults at Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown, CT was a hoax, may be a “challenge” according to an InfoWhores employee who, fearing for his life, requested anonymity before speaking to eTruePolitics.

“The gun grabbers are at it again,” commented NRA president Oliver North in an angry tweet. “What next? Ban assault rifles, and let squirrels proliferate?”

Jones told reporters that he expected current president Donald Trump to be the first guest at the Cemetery of Humanity, whenever it opens.

“Sadly, I understand Melania won’t be coming with the president,” Jones said, “as she’s moving back to Slovenia.”



Photo illustration by Ray Dougela; concept by John Nelson