New York (eTruePolitics) – The Commission on Presidential Debates announced today that the audio malfunction which has enraged Donald Trump and supporters was caused by the candidate’s repeated inability to keep his foot out of his mouth, not a defective microphone as Trump had charged.

“After a thorough forensic analysis we have determined that Mr. Trump’s microphone was in perfect working order,” said a put-upon Commission spokesman who refused to answer questions about Trump’s accusation or his foot-in-mouth issue.

“The mic was fine. End of story,” snapped the spokesman before abruptly leaving a packed media room.


Photo illustration by Ray Dougela