Palm Beach, FL (eTruePolitics) – In a yet another attempt to ingratiate himself with the far right wing of the GOP, House Speaker Mike Johnson unveiled a proposed new GOP symbol at a Florida fundraiser to a chilly reception. The immediate response to the unveiling included boos and hisses. Johnson was reportedly stunned by the antipathy and remained speechless behind the podium for what one pundit called “the longest five minutes of his life.” The distraught Johnson finally managed to squeak out “It was supposed to be a fun thing, I’m told,” before quickly leaving the stage.

“I’ve never seen a grown man cry that hard,” said one shaken aide.

“This doesn’t mean, I’m giving up bacon,” President Trump told supporters in a written statement. “President Trump has the greatest sense of humor of any American alive or dead,” said a Trump spokesman confirming Trump “bacon statement” was indeed humor.




Photo illustration by Ray Dougela