Indianapolis (eTrueSports) – Apparently tired of being mocked by Trump supporter Bobby Knight for his now infamous verbal flub calling a basketball rim a “ring,” Ted Cruz is calling for the carpet-bombing of the former basketball coach’s highly fortified Indiana compound, eTrueSports has learned.
“I want see his lawn glow in the dark,” Cruz reportedly told military advisors.
Frank Coffey is the author of the humor books "The Complete Idoit's Guide for Dumies" (Ten Speed Press), "The All Time Baseball Teams Book" (St. Martin's Press), "The Wit and Wisdom of George Steinbrenner (New American Library)," and "The Anti-Everybody Joke Book" (PaperJacks). As an editor, packager and author he has over 200 books on his resume, including four novels; has written for television and film, and been a book, newspaper and magazine editor. His name, Frank Downs Coffey, isn't technically a sentence but close enough.
Quote of the day: From a perspective juror in Trump trial: “I wouldn’t believe Trump if his tongue was notarized.” She was excused.
Donald Trump has reportedly refused to file a Missing Person’s Search Report for his current wife Melania Knauss Trump with the Florida Department of Law Enforcement. “He just doesn’t want to do anything,” shrugged an aide.
An investigation by the American Internet Research Firm failed to find any nude photos of Marjorie Taylor Greene. “There is a god,” an AIRF researcher told eTruePolitics.
Clarence Thomas will reportedly resign his Supreme Court seat to join My Pillow as Vice-President of Napping. “I’m a fathead and need a firm pillow,” explained Thomas in his lengthiest written statement since joining the Court in 1991.
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