by John Nelson & Frank Coffey

Washington (eTruePolitics) – A petition signed by thousands of pachyderms worldwide calling for the GOP to “cease and desist” using elephants as the party’s official symbol was presented to GOP Senator Mitch McConnell in Washington this morning, eTruePolitics has learned. The petition drive was the brainchild of – and led by – Hollywood film and television icon Dumbo.

“Mitch McConnell can suck my trunk,” said Dumbo who was quickly supported by the pachyderm community.

“It is an affront to Horton – or any other living animal for that matter – to be connected with the likes of politicians like Josh Hawley and Mitch McConnell,” said a Horton spokesman from the Dr. Seuss Foundation.

“Elephants have always avoided stepping on turtles,” said Babar, the 89-year-old pachyderm patriarch, “but mistakes happen.” A spokesman for Babar confirmed that the fictional elephant was “very much looking forward” to an April 1st appointment with Senator McConnell.

“I may not be the sharpest knife in the drawer,” said Dumbo in calling for the GOP to stop the pachyderm symbol practice, “but I’m not a soulless bastard either. “


Photo credit: Harvey Sapir/Pixabay. Donate today: