by Frank Coffey

Louisville, KY (eTruePolitics) – Citing current president Donald Trump’s “grotesque and inhumane” response to the murder of George Floyd by a Minnesota police officer, the General Assembly of the Presbyterian Church (USA) today voted unanimously to excommunicate ‘Donald J. Trump, a resident of Florida.’

“Mr. Trump is a loathsome human being and a disgrace to the Presbyterian Church,” said the General Assembly, the church’s main governing body, in a one-sentence statement.

Religious historians say it is the first time that the 800-year old Presbyterian Church has excommunicated anyone. “They didn’t boot out J. Edgar Hoover or Andrew Jackson,” said one scholar who requested anonymity before speaking to eTruePolitics because he feared for his life. “That tells you all you need to know about what Presbyterians think of Trump.”

“President Trump loves God,” said Kayleigh McEnany, a White House press secretary, in a charged interview with  reporters.  “They talk almost every night. In fact, God’s second on the president’s speed dial, right behind Sean Hannity.”