Valletta, Malta (eTruePolitics) – Malta, the independent island country located in the Mediterranean, tonight denied an expedited visa request from beleaguered American politician Ron DeSantis who claimed Maltese heritage.
The request was quickly rejected according to a Maltese official who said the government had no records of the DeSantis’ family in Malta. “We told them to try Italy.”
When contacted about an expedited visa for Ron DeSantis, an Italian official laughed. “No thank you. We can’t afford to be embarrassed.”
A DeSantis spokesman denied that the request for the emergency visas from Malta and Italy was related to the Florida governor’s pinwheeling presidential campaign.
“The Governor is very sad that evil Wokeness has infected two of his favorite places in the world,” said the spokesman. “The Governor promises he will boycott pasta, even linguine, for the foreseeable future.”