Washington, D.C. (eTruePolitics) – In what appears a flagrant violation of the U.S. Constitution’s Emoluments Clause, Trumpways, the iconic bus line founded in the 1930s by the current president’s father, Fred, today charged each GOP U.S. senator $399 for the round-trip from the Capitol to the White House and back. In a West Wing auditorium, Trump spoke to the senators, all who were treated to hot buttered popcorn, on the nuanced intricacies of the proposed Republican healthcare bill and an update on weather conditions at Mar-a-Lago.

“President Trump is a great American businessman,” said beleaguered White House spokesperson Kellyanne Conway. “No one in America – including the President and health insurers – ever has to apologize for making a buck. “

Trumpways’ hands-on CEO, Donald Trump, Jr., said “A couple of the geezer Senators squawked at the price, but when I explained that the tickets would be covered by the taxpayers, they were good to go.

“Speaking of going,” Trump, Jr. added, “and I’m sure I”ll get reamed for saying this –  Rand Paul has a problem. We’re talking a ten minute ride. “

Senators, reportedly all ready resentful for being treated like kindergartners, were said to be incensed with a bare bones brunch of Trump-labeled brown bag PB&J sandwiches ($14.95).

“The bread was stale, the peanut butter rancid,” said a senator who requested anonymity because she feared for her life. “Worst sandwich ever.”

 

Photo illustration by Ray Dougela