BUZZFEED FALLOUT: UNHINGED TRUMP SET TO RESIGN PRESIDENCY TO SPEND MORE TIME WITH HIS FAMILY, “INCLUDING MELANIA”
Washington, D.C. (eTruePolitics) – Following a devastating report in BuzzFeed indicating he had criminally ordered Michael Cohen to lie before Congress, a dispirited Donald Trump, the 45th president of the United States, will shortly resign the presidency, eTruePolitics has learned.
“The President is looking forward to spending more time with family including Melania,” said subdued White House spokeswoman Sarah Huckleberry Sanders. “Who’s going to introduce them?” asked a staffer who requested anonymity because she feared for her life.
“The president is very disappointed in BuzzFeed for exposing him to criminal prosecution,” added a West Wing aide.
Trump was described by the aide as a shell of himself. “He can barely talk,” said the aide, “so something good has come out of this difficult day.”
Photo illustrations by Ray Dougela