New York (eTruePolitics) – Donald Trump will call for a total and complete ban on all Zika virus-carrying Aedes mosquitoes entering the United States until “We can get a handle on the problem,” a source close to the candidate told eTruePolitics.
“The Aedes mosquitoes have no sense of reason or respect for human life,” said Trump, denouncing their daytime-active behavior as “brazen and immoral.”
Trump demanded that Congressional Democrats, who blocked the “Zika” bill when House Republicans added language allowing the Confederate flag to fly at veterans cemeteries, “stop with the political correctness all ready.”
“I have a Confederate flag in my basement,” said Trump, “and it looks great.”
Demonstrating an increasingly nuanced political approach to policy issues, Trump added that his proposed ban would not apply to the “vast majority of peace-loving mosquitoes who don’t hate America,” adding that he would be open to a meeting.
Editor-in-chief Frank Coffey is the author of the critically praised humor books The Complete Idoit's Guide for Dumies (sic), The All Time Baseball Teams Book, and The Wit and Wisdom of George Steinbrenner, as well as grownup books like 60 Minutes: 25 Years of Television's Finest Hour. He is the author of four novels, has written for television and movies, and been a book, newspaper and magazine editor.
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