Tag: @jasoninthehouse

SHOAT’S OVER: JACOB CHAFFETZ HAS LEFT THE STY

Washington (eTruePolitics) – Shoat’s over. Photo illustration by Ray Dougela

A spontaneous rally outside a Tallahassee federal prison protesting Trump aide Peter Navarro’s incarceration was dispersed without incident by the Tallahassee police Saturday afternoon. “Neither of them had their hearts in it,” shrugged a patrolman.
Donald Trump has reportedly refused to file a Missing Person’s Search Report for his current wife Melania Knauss Trump with the Florida Department of Law Enforcement. “He just doesn’t want to do anything,” shrugged an aide.
Rudy Giuliani’s (current) favorite wine: Pinot Aggrievio.
An investigation by the American Internet Research Firm failed to find any nude photos of Marjorie Taylor Greene. “There is a god,” an AIRF researcher told eTruePolitics.
Clarence Thomas will reportedly resign his Supreme Court seat to join My Pillow as Vice-President of Napping. “I’m a fathead and need a firm pillow,” explained Thomas in his lengthiest written statement since joining the Court in 1991.

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